“Someone’s not getting enough sex.” A common joke made by people who have noticed that someone might be snappier or more irritable, or maybe just peeling the labels off their drink bottle. Jokes aside, is there any credence to the joke?
But have you heard of skin hunger? Or skin starvation? What’s the different between the two? Do you need a hug? Or do you need some sexual healing? We aim to answer all these sexual wellness questions today.
Dirty talk – it's the secret sauce of spicing things up in the bedroom. Yet, for many, the thought of uttering naughty phrases can be intimidating. Fear not! With a few tips and a sprinkle of confidence, you'll be commanding the conversation like a seasoned pro in no time.
It’s always handy to have an arsenal of phrases handy. I mean, when all the blood is rushing elsewhere, it is difficult to come up with sexy phrases on the spot. Jot down some phrases from eroticas, poems, lines from movies/shows or even books.
A sultry whisper can transform even the most mundane phrase into a tantalising tease. And since you’re whispering, you'll need to cozy up close to your partner. No one wants to miss out on dirty talk because they can't hear you!
And for an added dose of sexy, do it right next their ear and add a little heavy breathing.
Everyone has different triggers as to what gets them going. The key is finding out which type of dirty talk works best on them by experimenting and trying it out in different ways
Eg. If you know they love it from behind, then tell them how much you want them to do that. Find out their trigger words, it's all about playing up their deepest desires.
Dirty talk can be a powerful tool for enhancing intimacy and arousal in the bedroom, but it requires confidence and communication. By embracing your desires and speaking with conviction, you can master the art of dirty talk and take your sexual experiences to new heights of pleasure and excitement. So, go ahead – let your words be the ultimate aphrodisiac!
Looking for something to level up your sex life? Check out our couple's intimacy workshop Better Sex Beyond The Bedroom, to help you increase intimacy and learn to prioritize your sexual relationship.
Men are visual creatures, while women, well they get turned on more by how they feel and their imaginations rather than just a strip-show. What turns a man on is totally different from a women, and once you understand the power of the emotional vibe, you'll be scoring major points in the hotness department!
Eye contact is hotttt. Lock eyes with her during a conversation, a shared laugh, or a more quiet moment, and let the connection deepen.
These small moments of intimacy are big turn-on for many women who like that direct connection.
Start with genuine compliments that make her feel like a queen. Whether it's her dazzling grin, infectious laughter, or sharp wit, it will help to set the mood without being too forward.
A well-timed compliment can unlock a woman's fiery passion and boost her desire, making her feel treasured and empowered. It shows that you see her worth and will leave her brimming with confidence!
The key is to spark excitement, curiosity and temptation. Things like teasing your partner throughout the day with flirty messages, telling her what you want to do to her when she gets back home, etc.
Letting her know that she’s on your mind makes her feel cherished and anticipate seeing you.
You know those movie moments when people trace their fingers gently on another’s skin? YAS. Deliberation can women weak in their knees.
Initiating touch can be tricky. Here are some tips to ensure it's done appropriately:
So here’s the deal, it’s not all about her vulva and the clitoris. While they are common zones, finding her other hotspots can change things up and make things more exciting.
Other erogenous hotspots include: nape of neck, lower back, inner wrists, scalp. The important thing is to pay attention to the areas she responds most to.
Picture this: you're rocking that smooth confident vibe but with a touch of understated charm. It's almost like you're whispering to her, "I’ve got this," without even uttering a word.
Hot tip: A lower-pitch voice oozes with a sense of power and finesse.
A person who puts thought into their grooming often appears more in control of themselves. And no we’re not saying to douse yourself in cologne/perfume, it’s really more about tidying yourself up and looking presentable.
Finding out what makes her orgasm not only makes her feel like a goddess but also turns sex from a chore into a thrilling experience.
Communication is key – have an open chat to understand her desires and preferences. By tailoring your approach, you're not just becoming a better lover; you're creating a unique pleasure journey for both of you.
Turning a girl on is an art that combines playfulness, attentiveness, and a dash of spontaneity. By keeping things light, respecting her pace, and embracing emotional connection, you're sure to create an environment where sparks fly naturally!
Need a deeper level of understanding for your relationship? Check out our pleasure empowerment workshop Better Sex Beyond The Bedroom, to help you increase intimacy and learn to prioritize your sexual relationship.
Experiencing discomfort or pain during intimate moments is not uncommon, and it's essential to take steps to address it. Seeking advice from a gynecologist or a healthcare professional can be incredibly helpful. They are knowledgeable guides trained to understand and address various concerns related to intimacy. Whether it's identifying potential mental or physical barriers or diagnosing conditions like vaginismus—a situation where the vaginal muscles involuntarily contract, causing pain during penetration—these professionals offer tailored solutions and exercises. Prioritizing your well-being by seeking their guidance ensures you receive the right support, guidance, and solutions that are specifically aimed at enhancing your comfort and pleasure during intimate moments.
Taking time to explore relaxation techniques and embrace self-pleasure can greatly contribute to feeling more relaxed and comfortable during intimate moments. The journey of self-exploration allows your body to adapt naturally at its own pace. It’s crucial to discover what brings you comfort, whether it's through self-exploration manually (using your fingers) or incorporating pleasure tools. Not only does this exploration help you gain a deeper understanding of your body, but it also enables you to effectively communicate your desires to your partner, fostering enhanced intimacy and pleasure in your relationship. If you're looking to explore self-pleasure but aren't sure where to start, worry not! We specialize in sex-ed workshops tailored for vulva-owners, offering guidance from our pleasure experts to empower you in claiming your right to pleasure. Dive into our workshops designed to provide sound guidance and explore your journey to pleasure with confidence such as, Demystifying Female Orgasms workshop. And if you're seeking to unlock a new chapter of closeness with your partner, check out our Better Sex Beyond The Bedroom workshop, curated to elevate intimacy and connection for couples.
Ah, lubricants! They are the unsung heroes in the world of intimacy. While your body naturally produces lubrication, a little extra can make a huge difference. Imagine a world of less friction and more pleasure! Typically, opting for water-based lubricants is a safe choice compatible with most sex toys and condoms but our top pick? Liquid Silk—a hybrid blend, known for its thicker texture—a fusion of water-based and silicone lubrication. It's praised for its extended usage without frequent reapplications, providing heightened comfort and moisturization for vaginal (and anal use!). Just to add, Liquid Silk is even recommended by KKH for patients experiencing vaginal dryness.
Let’s talk toys! They aren’t just fun; they can be incredibly empowering. As your pleasure expert here are some advice on pleasure tools that might assist with penetration:
Foreplay is a crucial part of intimacy! Did you know that it typically takes about 20 to 30 minutes (sometimes more!) for a woman to feel completely aroused and ready for penetrative sex? It's not just about physical touch; it's about engaging the mind too. So, don't underestimate the power of mental stimulation during foreplay. Try exploring fantasies, having open conversations about your desires (your likes and dislikes), or even dressing up in something sexy. These activities can help build trust, enhance communication, and create a deeper emotional connection between you and your partner.
When you lay the foundation with ample foreplay, the start of intercourse becomes more comfortable, natural, and less intimidating. This paves the way for a thoroughly satisfying experience, allowing both partners to feel more at ease and in sync. Whether it's exploring role-play ideas, slipping into sensual lingerie, or even trying out praise kinks 101—a method of showering your partner with affirmations to make them feel adored—these add-ons complement your intimate moments by intensifying connection and pleasure.
Remember, your sexual journey is uniquely your, and it's okay to take things at your pace. Whether you're exploring self-discovery or seeking guidance, it's essential to prioritize your comfort, confidence, and well-being. Take the time to explore, communicate openly with your partner, and most importantly, enjoy the journey to discovering your pleasure and intimacy.
Praise is good for you in more ways than one, and you don’t have to take our word for it, it’s scientifically proven. Compliments induce pleasure, kickstarting dopamine production that leads to feelings of gratification. Praise can also harmonise and strengthen your relationship, helping you to build trust and feel more comfortable with one another. When someone strokes your ego and tells you how fabulous you are, you’re going to feel good about yourself. It’s little wonder that praise kink is so popular!
You might be surprised to learn that praise kink doesn’t just benefit the person receiving the plaudits, it’s also advantageous to the person dishing out the niceties. If you’re offering praise you’re providing pleasure, increasing happiness, and reinforcing desired behaviour. Your partner is more likely to dress up, have fun and get raunchy especially if they know how much you like it and that you make them feel good about what they’re doing.
Receiving compliments may feel a bit strange at first, but embracing positive affirmations can heighten happiness, so why not accept those wonderful words?
BDSM is typically linked to discipline, impact, and bondage, but there’s more to kink than the thwack of a riding crop across bare buttocks. Being bad is certainly fun, but being good can be just as thrilling, and it allows you to delve into the gratifying world of praise kink. If you love compliments, praise kink could be right up your alley. This particular kink involves deriving satisfaction from giving or receiving positive affirmations, glowing feedback, and praise during day-to-day life, play, and sex.
Compliments are always welcome, be it a commendation for your hard work, a nod to your new hairstyle, or a standing ovation for the fantastic blow job you’ve just provided. Approval fills us with joy, especially when it’s delivered by a special someone. For fans of praise kink, the sense of pride is joined by another feeling - sexual arousal. When it comes to praise kink, compliments not only provide gratification they’re also a massive turn-on.
Positive reinforcement can be given in a variety of ways, if you’re new to the world of praise kink you might not be sure where to start. Thankfully, there are a couple of common phrases that work well for all occasions e.g. “You’re such a good girl / boy,” and “I’m so proud of you,” are encouraging on all levels. You can also tailor your phrases to fit the situation.
We’ve touched on telling your partner that they are a “good girl/boy.” This phrase works particularly well if you share a total power exchange (TPE) or Dominant/submissive (D/s) relationship. Praising your submissive can bring you closer and reinforce your roles. Other ways to praise behaviour include “You really know just how to turn me on,” and “That's right, keep going, just like that."
Delight and arouse your other half by highlighting their good points and assets. This is a good way to vanquish insecurities and build body confidence. Phrases such as “Bend over and show me your cute ass",” “Your ass looks amazing in those jeans,” and “Your lips are so kissable,” will make your partner feel like a million dollars.
Pleased with the way your partner is going about things? Tell them how well they’re doing by uttering phrases such as "You can really take a spanking, I like that," and “The sounds you make are so hot.” Praising their performance will motivate your partner to continue on the same path.
When praise acts as a turn-on, accolades in the bedroom can take sex from run-of-the-mill to remarkable. Telling your partner how much you fancy them and want them will give them one hell of a boost. Try “I love it when you lick/ suck, [body part],” or “You feel incredible, I want to make love to you all night long” and “You are an amazing lover.”
It can take time to figure out which phrases turn you on and which switch you off, and whilst some like to be praised verbally, others feel that actions speak louder than words. A broad smile, a cheeky wink, or a reassuring squeeze of the arm can all be used as subtle ways to praise your other half. You could even mix it up by using a combination of the two e.g., an encouraging kiss on the cheek combined with the words “You’re doing so well, I’m so pleased,” can work wonders.
As with all BDSM-style play, you should discuss your boundaries and limits up front and always engage in SSC (safe, sane, consensual) play. You’ll need to talk about how this is going to play out for you before praise kink becomes part of the equation. A few things to think about:
Praise kink, sex, and BDSM can be a heady combination and a great way to spice up your love life. Need a little inspiration? Here are some ideas to get those creative juices flowing…
Enhance foreplay and intercourse with flattering compliments. You don’t have to go straight to the bedroom, start the night with a fancy meal (don’t forget to tell your partner how gorgeous they look).
Once you’re ready for bedroom antics you can set the mood with lingerie and even sexy masks for a touch of mystery. Throw in sex toys to ramp things up, adding praise kink as you go, “I love it when you slide that glass dildo in and out of your pussy.”
A good spanking works wonderfully well with praise kink. “That’s it, over my lap now, you’re such a compliant slave.” The flat of the palm slapping bare cheeks, “I love it when you take your punishment so well.” The thud of the paddle and the sting of the riding crop coupled with teasing words, “Look how well your beautiful round buttocks jiggle”, can elevate the whole experience.
Bondage and praise kink fit together exceptionally well. Restrain your lover and give them gentle encouragement as you bind their ankles and wrists with rope, “You’re such a pretty rope bunny, let’s suspend you so everyone can see.” Other restraints work well with praise kink too. Why not secure your submissive to the bed with cuffs, adding a blindfold and ball gag to ensure they stay put? Watch them squirm as you whisper in their ear, telling your partner how much you love it when they obey you and are at your mercy.
If praise kink seems nerve-racking you can take the edge off by combining it with role play. There are plenty of costumes and scenarios to choose from, and adopting another persona can help you to relax. Play out a classroom scene featuring a strict teacher and naughty student “You are so clever! Here’s a gold star,” or engage in medical play Doctor and patient style “Super, you’re doing so well, I’ll just lube my rectal thermometer.”
If you’re feeling adventurous you can go a step further and combine praise kink with more extreme BDSM activities, such as age play e.g. “Be a good girl / boy for Daddy.” Humiliation play including forced feminization (encouraging a male submissive to dress as a female) invites an element of praise kink too, “Oh look how pretty Simon looks with his pink bow and frilly knickers, how cute.”
“To praise is an investment in happiness” – David Dunn
If you think you might have a penchant for praise kink you’re not alone, after all, there are plenty of BDSM fans in the world. Some crave pain, some relish pleasure and others prefer a heady mix of the two. Praise kink falls on the mild side of play, and you can both try it out wherever and whenever you’re comfortable.
It’s all about mutual pleasure, offering compliments will make your partner feel happy, which in turn will make you feel great. With praise kink you get the added bonus of arousal and a sexual buzz. So if you’re looking to invest in your happiness and boost your sex life, why not give praise kink a go?
Still not sure where to start with praise kink? Check out our pleasure empowerment workshop Intro to kink, to help you get acquainted with other worldly pleasures to unlock your sexual potential.
Mindful masturbation is essentially self-pleasure that focuses entirely on what makes you feel good instead of the end goal, ie. orgasms.
It is all about giving yourself permission to be present in the moment, reconnecting with your body on a different level through creative exploration, and becoming more in tune with your sensations and pleasure.
