Dirty talk – it's the secret sauce of spicing things up in the bedroom. Yet, for many, the thought of uttering naughty phrases can be intimidating. Fear not! With a few tips and a sprinkle of confidence, you'll be commanding the conversation like a seasoned pro in no time.

1. It's Ok Not To Be Original 

It’s always handy to have an arsenal of phrases handy. I mean, when all the blood is rushing elsewhere, it is difficult to come up with sexy phrases on the spot. Jot down some phrases from eroticas, poems, lines from movies/shows or even books.

2. Lower Your Voice & Lean In

A sultry whisper can transform even the most mundane phrase into a tantalising tease. And since you’re whispering, you'll need to cozy up close to your partner. No one wants to miss out on dirty talk because they can't hear you!

And for an added dose of sexy, do it right next their ear and add a little heavy breathing.

3. Personalise It

Everyone has different triggers as to what gets them going. The key is finding out which type of dirty talk works best on them by experimenting and trying it out in different ways 

Eg. If you know they love it from behind, then tell them how much you want them to do that. Find out their trigger words, it's all about playing up their deepest desires.

DIRTY TALKING EXAMPLES

1. Hot & heavy single words or sounds:

• “please”, “harder”, “more”, “faster”, “deeper”, “yes”
• sounds like moans, sighs, or gasps
• some people also enjoy hearing their name being said during sex

2. Be intentional or give recognitions:

• “Don't cum until I say so”
• “You feel so good inside me”
• “I love it when you touch me there”
• “Just like that”
• “Your cock/pussy feels amazing”
• “Harder, baby. I want us to come together”

3. Build sexual tension:

• “I miss the way you taste”
• “I just keep thinking about you grabbing me and taking me”
• “I'm going to f*ck you so hard when I see you”
• “I want to feel how wet/hard you are”
• “My panties are soaked, get home quick”
• “I’ve been very bad and need to be punished”

Men are visual creatures, while women, well they get turned on more by how they feel and their imaginations rather than just a strip-show. What turns a man on is totally different from a women, and once you understand the power of the emotional vibe, you'll be scoring major points in the hotness department!

1. Eye Contact

Eye contact is hotttt. Lock eyes with her during a conversation, a shared laugh, or a more quiet moment, and let the connection deepen.

These small moments of intimacy are big turn-on for many women who like that direct connection.

2. Compliments

Start with genuine compliments that make her feel like a queen. Whether it's her dazzling grin, infectious laughter, or sharp wit, it will help to set the mood without being too forward.

 A well-timed compliment can unlock a woman's fiery passion and boost her desire, making her feel treasured and empowered. It shows that you see her worth and will leave her brimming with confidence!

3. Create Anticipation

The key is to spark excitement, curiosity and temptation. Things like teasing your partner throughout the day with flirty messages, telling her what you want to do to her when she gets back home, etc.

Letting her know that she’s on your mind makes her feel cherished and anticipate seeing you.

4. Gentle Touch

You know those movie moments when people trace their fingers gently on another’s skin? YAS. Deliberation can women weak in their knees.

Initiating touch can be tricky. Here are some tips to ensure it's done appropriately:

• Touch non-invasive areas like the hand, elbow, or arm.
• If you're unsure, it's wise to ask for consent. This shows your respect for her boundaries and ensures that you're both comfortable.

5. Find Her Erogenous Zones

So here’s the deal, it’s not all about her vulva and the clitoris. While they are common zones, finding her other hotspots can change things up and make things more exciting.

Other erogenous hotspots include: nape of neck, lower back, inner wrists, scalp. The important thing is to pay attention to the areas she responds most to.

 6. Confidence, Not Cockiness

Picture this: you're rocking that smooth confident vibe but with a touch of understated charm. It's almost like you're whispering to her, "I’ve got this," without even uttering a word.

Hot tip: A lower-pitch voice oozes with a sense of power and finesse.

7. Personal Grooming

A person who puts thought into their grooming often appears more in control of themselves. And no we’re not saying to douse yourself in cologne/perfume, it’s really more about tidying yourself up and looking presentable.

• Choose simple and clean styles
• Wear something muted and natural, like musk instead of an overpowering scent

8. Be Mindful Of Her Pleasure

Finding out what makes her orgasm not only makes her feel like a goddess but also turns sex from a chore into a thrilling experience.

Communication is key – have an open chat to understand her desires and preferences. By tailoring your approach, you're not just becoming a better lover; you're creating a unique pleasure journey for both of you.

Turning a girl on is an art that combines playfulness, attentiveness, and a dash of spontaneity. By keeping things light, respecting her pace, and embracing emotional connection, you're sure to create an environment where sparks fly naturally!

Need a deeper level of understanding for your relationship? Check out our pleasure empowerment workshop Better Sex Beyond The Bedroom, to help you increase intimacy and learn to prioritize your sexual relationship.

We often hear that men are visual creatures, what he sees can easily turn him on. Well they can get turned on by what they hear and feel as well! Turning a guy on is all about embracing the playful, fun-loving aspects of your connection. If you're ready to send shivers down his spine and ignite that spark, read on!

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Are you venturing into the world of intimacy and looking to feel more confident and empowered? Stepping into this new realm can indeed be exhilarating but might come with some uncertainties. Whether you're curious, nervous, or excited, here's a guide to help you embrace your sexual journey with confidence and assurance. Let's explore some tips and tools that could make your experience more comfortable and enjoyable!

1. Seek Guidance from Healthcare Professionals

Experiencing discomfort or pain during intimate moments is not uncommon, and it's essential to take steps to address it. Seeking advice from a gynecologist or a healthcare professional can be incredibly helpful. They are knowledgeable guides trained to understand and address various concerns related to intimacy. Whether it's identifying potential mental or physical barriers or diagnosing conditions like vaginismus—a situation where the vaginal muscles involuntarily contract, causing pain during penetration—these professionals offer tailored solutions and exercises. Prioritizing your well-being by seeking their guidance ensures you receive the right support, guidance, and solutions that are specifically aimed at enhancing your comfort and pleasure during intimate moments.

2. Embrace Self-Discovery: Your Personal Journey to Pleasure

Taking time to explore relaxation techniques and embrace self-pleasure can greatly contribute to feeling more relaxed and comfortable during intimate moments. The journey of self-exploration allows your body to adapt naturally at its own pace. It’s crucial to discover what brings you comfort, whether it's through self-exploration manually (using your fingers) or incorporating pleasure tools. Not only does this exploration help you gain a deeper understanding of your body, but it also enables you to effectively communicate your desires to your partner, fostering enhanced intimacy and pleasure in your relationship.
If you're looking to explore self-pleasure but aren't sure where to start, worry not! We specialize in sex-ed workshops tailored for vulva-owners, offering guidance from our pleasure experts to empower you in claiming your right to pleasure. Dive into our workshops designed to provide sound guidance and explore your journey to pleasure with confidence such as, Demystifying Female Orgasms workshop. And if you're seeking to unlock a new chapter of closeness with your partner, check out our Better Sex Beyond The Bedroom workshop, curated to elevate intimacy and connection for couples.

3. Lubricants: Your Secret Weapon for Comfortable Intimacy

Ah, lubricants! They are the unsung heroes in the world of intimacy. While your body naturally produces lubrication, a little extra can make a huge difference. Imagine a world of less friction and more pleasure! Typically, opting for water-based lubricants is a safe choice compatible with most sex toys and condoms but our top pick? Liquid Silk—a hybrid blend, known for its thicker texture—a fusion of water-based and silicone lubrication. It's praised for its extended usage without frequent reapplications, providing heightened comfort and moisturization for vaginal (and anal use!). Just to add, Liquid Silk is even recommended by KKH for patients experiencing vaginal dryness. 

4. Pleasure Tools: Where Fun Meets Empowerment

Let’s talk toys! They aren’t just fun; they can be incredibly empowering. As your pleasure expert here are some advice on pleasure tools that might assist with penetration:

•  Crystal Glass Gspot: Glass toys have a remarkably smooth texture, making vaginal penetration effortless. With a few drops of lube on the toy and vaginal opening, gently massage your vulva before gradually using it for penetration. Some benefits of using a glass toy is that it is also ideal for temperature play; consider warming the toy in water for added sensation, ensuring the temperature suits your comfort level before use. P.s: Our glass toys are made of high-quality borosilicate glass that is shatter-resistant, is non-porous and hypoallergenic, making it one of the safest materials out there. 
  
  
• Dolce Vita Rose: Featuring both suction for external stimulation and a thrusting dildo function for penetration, this vibrating toy offers versatile pleasure. The vibrations may aid in relaxing the vaginal muscles, facilitating smoother penetration. Engaging erogenous zones, particularly the clitoris, with foreplay using this toy can help relieve muscle tension, making penetration more comfortable. This pleasure tool can be a great addition to your intimate moments.
  
  
• Vaginal Dilators or Smaller-sized Sex Toys: Specially designed devices can gradually stretch and relax vaginal muscles. However, using these should be under the guidance of a healthcare professional for optimal results.


5. Foreplay: The Magic Ingredient for Pleasurable Moments

Foreplay is a crucial part of intimacy! Did you know that it typically takes about 20 to 30 minutes (sometimes more!) for a woman to feel completely aroused and ready for penetrative sex? It's not just about physical touch; it's about engaging the mind too. So, don't underestimate the power of mental stimulation during foreplay. Try exploring fantasies, having open conversations about your desires (your likes and dislikes), or even dressing up in something sexy. These activities can help build trust, enhance communication, and create a deeper emotional connection between you and your partner. 

When you lay the foundation with ample foreplay, the start of intercourse becomes more comfortable, natural, and less intimidating. This paves the way for a thoroughly satisfying experience, allowing both partners to feel more at ease and in sync. Whether it's exploring role-play ideas, slipping into sensual lingerie, or even trying out praise kinks 101—a method of showering your partner with affirmations to make them feel adored—these add-ons complement your intimate moments by intensifying connection and pleasure.

Remember, your sexual journey is uniquely your, and it's okay to take things at your pace. Whether you're exploring self-discovery or seeking guidance, it's essential to prioritize your comfort, confidence, and well-being. Take the time to explore, communicate openly with your partner, and most importantly, enjoy the journey to discovering your pleasure and intimacy.

One of the fantastic things about sex, is the modern age of innovative design that has provided us with game changing aides and sex toys are an elegant, enjoyable ways not only to introduce yourself or your partner to anal sex, but to develop the experiences you might already be having together.

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It floored me how close to the sensation of actual intercourse using the Hedonist Poseidon turned out to be. And not just like any intimate experience with any partner, but with one who is actually skilled at using their internal muscles to coax every last bit out of you. It's almost scary how satisfying using this masturbator was!

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Praise is good for you in more ways than one, and you don’t have to take our word for it, it’s scientifically proven. Compliments induce pleasure, kickstarting dopamine production that leads to feelings of gratification. Praise can also harmonise and strengthen your relationship, helping you to build trust and feel more comfortable with one another. When someone strokes your ego and tells you how fabulous you are, you’re going to feel good about yourself. It’s little wonder that praise kink is so popular!

You might be surprised to learn that praise kink doesn’t just benefit the person receiving the plaudits, it’s also advantageous to the person dishing out the niceties. If you’re offering praise you’re providing pleasure, increasing happiness, and reinforcing desired behaviour. Your partner is more likely to dress up, have fun and get raunchy especially if they know how much you like it and that you make them feel good about what they’re doing.

Receiving compliments may feel a bit strange at first, but embracing positive affirmations can heighten happiness, so why not accept those wonderful words?

 

What is Praise Kink?

BDSM is typically linked to discipline, impact, and bondage, but there’s more to kink than the thwack of a riding crop across bare buttocks. Being bad is certainly fun, but being good can be just as thrilling, and it allows you to delve into the gratifying world of praise kink. If you love compliments, praise kink could be right up your alley. This particular kink involves deriving satisfaction from giving or receiving positive affirmations, glowing feedback, and praise during day-to-day life, play, and sex.

Praise Kink Vs Compliments

Compliments are always welcome, be it a commendation for your hard work, a nod to your new hairstyle, or a standing ovation for the fantastic blow job you’ve just provided. Approval fills us with joy, especially when it’s delivered by a special someone. For fans of praise kink, the sense of pride is joined by another feeling - sexual arousal. When it comes to praise kink, compliments not only provide gratification they’re also a massive turn-on.

Popular Praise Kink Phrases

via GIFER

Positive reinforcement can be given in a variety of ways, if you’re new to the world of praise kink you might not be sure where to start. Thankfully, there are a couple of common phrases that work well for all occasions e.g. “You’re such a good girl / boy,” and “I’m so proud of you,” are encouraging on all levels. You can also tailor your phrases to fit the situation.

Praising behaviour

We’ve touched on telling your partner that they are a “good girl/boy.” This phrase works particularly well if you share a total power exchange (TPE) or Dominant/submissive (D/s) relationship. Praising your submissive can bring you closer and reinforce your roles. Other ways to praise behaviour include “You really know just how to turn me on,” and “That's right, keep going, just like that."

Praising appearance

Delight and arouse your other half by highlighting their good points and assets. This is a good way to vanquish insecurities and build body confidence. Phrases such as “Bend over and show me your cute ass",” “Your ass looks amazing in those jeans,” and “Your lips are so kissable,” will make your partner feel like a million dollars.

Praising performance

Pleased with the way your partner is going about things? Tell them how well they’re doing by uttering phrases such as "You can really take a spanking, I like that," and “The sounds you make are so hot.” Praising their performance will motivate your partner to continue on the same path.

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Praising sexual prowess

When praise acts as a turn-on, accolades in the bedroom can take sex from run-of-the-mill to remarkable. Telling your partner how much you fancy them and want them will give them one hell of a boost. Try “I love it when you lick/ suck, [body part],” or “You feel incredible, I want to make love to you all night long” and “You are an amazing lover.”

Experimenting With Praise Kink

It can take time to figure out which phrases turn you on and which switch you off, and whilst some like to be praised verbally, others feel that actions speak louder than words. A broad smile, a cheeky wink, or a reassuring squeeze of the arm can all be used as subtle ways to praise your other half. You could even mix it up by using a combination of the two e.g., an encouraging kiss on the cheek combined with the words “You’re doing so well, I’m so pleased,” can work wonders.

Boundaries and Limits

As with all BDSM-style play, you should discuss your boundaries and limits up front and always engage in SSC (safe, sane, consensual) play. You’ll need to talk about how this is going to play out for you before praise kink becomes part of the equation. A few things to think about:

• What type of praise are you both comfortable with?
  You can opt for verbal praise, non-verbal praise, or a mixture of the two.

• Are there any phrases you would like to steer clear of?
  E.g., some find “Good girl / boy” too condescending. Highlight any problematic phrases to prevent awkward moments.

• Is praise kink just for sex and play or other occasions too?
  Do you prefer praise kink to be kept in the bedroom or would you like to incorporate it into other areas of your life?

• Where and when is kink praise acceptable?
  Decide if kink praise should be kept within the confines of the home, or if you can indulge in it at other times too, e.g., shopping in the supermarket, at a restaurant, or out with friends.

• Overt kink praise or clandestine compliments?
  It’s not good sport to unwittingly involve vanilla people in your kink e.g., dishing out an over the knee spanking during the morning train commute wouldn’t be well-received by many of your fellow travellers! However, praise kink is easier to incorporate. Others are likely to smile and cast admiring glances if they hear you complimenting your partner – they won’t have a clue that your other half is sexually aroused by your compassionate comments.

Using Praise Kink To Boost Sex and Play

Praise kink, sex, and BDSM can be a heady combination and a great way to spice up your love life. Need a little inspiration? Here are some ideas to get those creative juices flowing…

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1) Praise Kink and Sexual Play

Enhance foreplay and intercourse with flattering compliments. You don’t have to go straight to the bedroom, start the night with a fancy meal (don’t forget to tell your partner how gorgeous they look).

Once you’re ready for bedroom antics you can set the mood with lingerie and even sexy masks for a touch of mystery. Throw in sex toys to ramp things up, adding praise kink as you go, “I love it when you slide that glass dildo in and out of your pussy.”

2) Praise Kink and Impact

A good spanking works wonderfully well with praise kink. “That’s it, over my lap now, you’re such a compliant slave.” The flat of the palm slapping bare cheeks, “I love it when you take your punishment so well.” The thud of the paddle and the sting of the riding crop coupled with teasing words, “Look how well your beautiful round buttocks jiggle”, can elevate the whole experience.

3) Praise Kink and Bondage

Bondage and praise kink fit together exceptionally well. Restrain your lover and give them gentle encouragement as you bind their ankles and wrists with rope, “You’re such a pretty rope bunny, let’s suspend you so everyone can see.” Other restraints work well with praise kink too. Why not secure your submissive to the bed with cuffs, adding a blindfold and ball gag to ensure they stay put? Watch them squirm as you whisper in their ear, telling your partner how much you love it when they obey you and are at your mercy.

4) Praise Kink and Role Play

If praise kink seems nerve-racking you can take the edge off by combining it with role play. There are plenty of costumes and scenarios to choose from, and adopting another persona can help you to relax. Play out a classroom scene featuring a strict teacher and naughty student “You are so clever! Here’s a gold star,” or engage in medical play Doctor and patient style “Super, you’re doing so well, I’ll just lube my rectal thermometer.”

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5) Praise Kink and Edge Play

If you’re feeling adventurous you can go a step further and combine praise kink with more extreme BDSM activities, such as age play e.g. “Be a good girl / boy for Daddy.” Humiliation play including forced feminization (encouraging a male submissive to dress as a female) invites an element of praise kink too, “Oh look how pretty Simon looks with his pink bow and frilly knickers, how cute.”

“To praise is an investment in happiness” – David Dunn

If you think you might have a penchant for praise kink you’re not alone, after all, there are plenty of BDSM fans in the world. Some crave pain, some relish pleasure and others prefer a heady mix of the two. Praise kink falls on the mild side of play, and you can both try it out wherever and whenever you’re comfortable.

It’s all about mutual pleasure, offering compliments will make your partner feel happy, which in turn will make you feel great. With praise kink you get the added bonus of arousal and a sexual buzz. So if you’re looking to invest in your happiness and boost your sex life, why not give praise kink a go?

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Still not sure where to start with praise kink? Check out our pleasure empowerment workshop Intro to kink, to help you get acquainted with other worldly pleasures to unlock your sexual potential.

We know that sometimes it gets 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 when you start to talk about kink but having a kink is nothing to be ashamed of! In fact a new study shows that about half of adults have desires and fantasies that are ‘unconventional’. 😈

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Mindful masturbation is essentially self-pleasure that focuses entirely on what makes you feel good instead of the end goal, ie. orgasms.  

It is all about giving yourself permission to be present in the moment, reconnecting with your body on a different level through creative exploration, and becoming more in tune with your sensations and pleasure.

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BDSM stands for, bondage, discipline/dominance, submission and masochism. Although BDSM can be correlated to sex or activities of a sexual nature, for some people, it is about mindfulness. Specifically, in the practice of mindful sex, by focusing on the sensation of pain and turning it into pleasure. 

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This felt totally new to me as I had always been a loyal clit orgasm lover but the Sakura gave me a full body, explosion of sensation I never thought was possible! It literally made my toes curled! And it was then that I realised, there was no coming back from the euphoria of having a blended orgasm.

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